Fits and Giggles

There is a saying, that once something is done it cannot be forgotten. The saying holds truth to many situations and can be used to explain some of the deepest wounds but can also be used to trigger and unwrap something new all in itself. The flashback that is felt from a simple scent, lyric, or thought can instantly remind oneself of where they’ve been and the minutes that have now passed, only to reopen a memory linked to a series of moments that make you who you are. In a way this seems counteractive from the way we are told to live, without looking back, forgiving and forgetting, moving forward.  They say its much easier said then done. When "they" spoke those words, they set up the exception to the rule, the room for failure. Every piece, emotion, broken, healed or not yet produced will always have the power to pull one back to where  they were before. That is the difficulty in trying to find which piece will have an impact and which piece will simply connect the oth...

They say your twenties are when you are supposed to explore, fail, hit ultimate highs and lows and basically figure out who you are--what your supposed to be. I SAY this is nonsense and soul searching will never end, which is an exciting way to look at it, because who really wants to be 100% set in stone and defined by 30?  The rapid searching of the soul of my 26 years of life have brought me to the following educated realizations: I have realized I am the most indecisive person I know I have a glare stare--could be compared to the b face scenario, but only periodically I can “nap” for a straight four hours with no shame I have a very low threshold when it comes to patience I still crave the food of a 4 year old I do not like being told what to do, or having constraints I get heartburn from the tiniest spice--cant wait for the 200k+ heart burns to come I have to push myself to even think of going on a date or pursuing anything from the opposite sex--so.much.w...

This post is going to be one of those posts that after you get halfway through you're going to think "Seriously shut up, stop complaining, annoying beautiful brunette girl"- points for the last part. Anyways don't care and am going to go against my threshold for promoting whining because I have somehow contracted some type of disease, in the summer, and am currently wasting a weekend watching ridiculous lifetime movies and feeling bad for myself. SO because my tude is at an all time high and steadily increasing, the following provides a few main I seriously CAN'T deal points. 1. PDA on a subway at 8am              Setting the scene: a MONDAY morning, 8am, crowded subway, and two groggling beings on top of each other sticking their disgustingly just/probably didn't brush tongues down each others throats. I'm assuming the vulgarness is not made aware due to the lack of air you are not able to get to your brain due to your lungs being completely overwh...

As an avid over thinker I find that it comes quite easy to take a situation, dwell, and store that one memory or conversation away to then allow that scenario to mold or pinpoint how you handle or feel about others in the future. This I have noticed is not a trait I am proud to have. The realness of the downfall this mindset can have only really hits you when certain situations continue to happen, and although you don't want to acknowledge or admit, the real problem might be your way of thinking. I have come to find that it is quite easy to blame others for a dispute, unkind words that were passed, or communication that was lost.  I have also found that  easy never leads to success, easy doesn't fix those quarrels, mend the words, or embrace a phone call. Trying to pave your way in this crazy place we live on a daily basis is a battle in itself. Emotional relationships are built, burned, or times erased. Financial downfalls are hit or peaks are reached. Personal growth is co...

I think one thing that a girl begins to think about after they venture over the 25 and above gap is their relationship with their father. Although this is not to say that relationship is not important in a girl’s life while growing up, it just begins to have a larger presence. One of the main reasons I feel is that this age begins the age of the weddings, whether your involved in a wedding or not, the mere presence whether it be through TLC, online videos, pinterest boards, the realness of that moment hits you---the day your father walks you down the isle.  To me this signifies a concrete moment that in a split second you go from being your father’s little girl to putting your trust in another male and cutting certain strings, this is a string that has many years of growth...and in an instant is intertwined. I think father/daughter relationships come in many forms, depending on his upbringing, values, and background.  His characteristics and ways of living his life will...

I think some of the best writing--venting is done when you're in an uncomfortable situation and or mood and when you let someone in, a complete stranger, without holding back. Most of my posts have been comical at most and have shown a certain side. Below is something I put together when I wasn't feeling like the jovial-sarcastic-girl I usually tend to be, because at that moment, I wasn't. One of the weird things about a picture is that it can make time stand still, looking at a sketch, a polaroid, a Facebook photo, you're directly taken back to that exact moment, you remember your surroundings, you remember what you were wearing, eating, drinking, who you were with. What I haven't realized until now is that you also morph into that person again, you have their feelings, you take on that mold. "The girl in paris", the sketch I had drawn 4 years ago, is starring at me dead in the eye. As Im searching for clarity on anything Im dealing with, i find mysel...

I feel it only fitting to dedicate this blog to my now 2 month residency within the great city of NY. If you know me, or had the advantage of looking at my "What i want to do with my life" creation, that was manufactured/established in the 8th grade of good old little villa, you will know that moving/building my career in NYC has been something on my list since I was a little girl. I remember looking at the magazines of the size -0 girls, with legs for days, in their mini skirts, tucked in buttoned up white shirt with embellished collar, hair perfectly tucked, with the perfect blazer and nude platforms, heading into the office, completely put together and ready to take on the world. I remember wanting to be her. The thing about those girls in the magazines is that they can't talk, and forget to leave out the reality of that perfect photoshopped scene they are publishing to girls everywhere and that it takes a little more sweat, tears, flats, and possible tequila here and...